Great Easter Activity

A few years ago I heard some people on a radio program (can't remember which) talking about Resurrection Eggs and I was intrigued. I checked them out and bought a set of them I haven't done a good job of using them, because I forget until a few days before Easter. This year, it is on my calendar and I will start them on April 1. They are a great tool to teach your children about Jesus's life, death and resurrection. Just wanted to share! You can check them out here.

Jacob's Hospital Stay and What I Learned

I have finally caught up on sleep, am feeling fairly normal, and have had a chance to process the happenings of the stomach bug in our home and the havoc that it wreaked. I am going to share our experience here and a couple of lessons that I learned in the process. Be warned that this is a long post!
If you read this post, then you know that the stomach bug started on Wednesday with Jonathan, spread to me on Thursday around noon, and hit Jacob on Thursday evening. By Friday morning he was starting to keep fluids down. He didn’t have an appetite, but I wasn’t concerned about that…I still didn’t have one, neither did Jonathan. Jacob did well on Friday. Friday night was good, and then Saturday, he woke up happy and feeling fairly well. We decided to take the boys to a birthday party of a friend of theirs and they were so excited! The boys did not eat at the party, not even cake! Wasn’t concerned. They had a bottle of Gatorade and we were good to go. Manly Man got them a little ice cream that afternoon, but they barely ate any. Still, not worried. They went to bed great, slept great.
Sunday morning, Jacob calls me from the bathroom and I run in there just in time for him to throw up again. Manly Man is off to work and I just try to make the best of things. I called the doctor and, since he didn’t have a fever and had stopped throwing up, and was keeping fluids down, I didn’t take him to the doctor. That afternoon he slept for about 3 hours. It was kind of hard to wake him up actually. When he did get up he looked pretty lethargic and I got worried, but pushed the fluids again. At 11pm, he threw up again and then two more times. I knew he was going to go to the hospital on Monday. I really believe the Lord prepped me for that one, and I was so thankful for it. He didn’t sleep soundly that night, nor did I.
When Manly Man got home, he took him to the walk-in clinic at the peds office. It was packed! The nurses even came out and asked that anyone that didn’t have a major concern should come back or call and make an appointment because it was going to be a long wait. Manly Man stayed with a limp, sleepy Jacob in his arms. He got there at 8:20am and didn’t get called back until 10:30am. Then it was another 30 minutes before the dr got in there. I was at home, trying to get some laundry done, spend time with Jonathan and rest, because I knew what was coming. At the doctor’s office, they checked Jacob’s blood sugar and it was down to 45. Normal is 60 to 120 and, if it had gone much lower, he could have had a seizure! Manly Man called and told me they were probably going to admit him so I called my mom in Charlotte, and jumped in the shower. Manly Man called back and said they were admitting him. I called him mom while shaving my legs in the shower and told her and asked her to come to take care of Jonathan. I called my mom back and told her I didn’t need her, but I wanted her. She left work within 30 minutes and got on the road. I explained to Jonathan what was happening and that I wanted to be with him, but that Jacob needed me and he said it was ok. My mil got here and I left and headed to the children’s hospital.
When I walked in Jacob’s room, I was prepared to see him looking so small in that bed and he did. Last year and very dear friend’s son was put in the hospital for dehydration from rotavirus and I had gone to see them. I was so thankful that I knew what to expect. He was sipping a little bit of juice, in hospital pjs, lying in the bed, looking so frail. He was barely awake and I climbed in the bed with him to snuggle. I didn’t want to be any where else. They had put some numbing cream on the back of both hands to numb the IV sight. They let it stay there, taped on, for an hour and then do the IV. It didn’t work for Jacob. Poor thing. But they got his IV in and splinted his arm so that he wouldn’t bend his wrist and mess up the IV. He cried, but was so brave! They drew some blood and his blood sugar was back up to 65, thankfully! They started pushing fluids in him…they push them hard and fast to shock the cells for the first hour and then slow down the drip. He slept some and then started to perk up a little. Manly Man went home to relieve his mom and bring Jonathan back up to the hospital. I stayed with him and when they got back; my mom had just gotten there too. His color started coming back after about 3 or 4 hours of the IV fluids. We had many friends stop by with snacks, toys and books for us. Many others called to check on us. I felt so blessed and so loved! Jacob slept really hard that night. The nurses came in every hour to check his IV and vitals and that was exhausting for my mom and me. They even checked his blood sugar and he slept through it! It was up to 125 by about 9:30pm. So very excited about that! The doctor came in and told me that the plan for Tuesday would be to push fluids orally and see how he did. Here, the Lord prepped me again that he wouldn’t be going home on Tuesday. Don’t ask me how I knew, it was just the Lord.

(These pictures are about 3 or 4 hours after they started his IV fluids on Monday. Notice the splint? That was Jacob's favorite part...he even brought it home!)

So Tuesday morning he woke up and was full of spunk and energy. They disconnected the IV fluids, leaving in the hep lock, and he was able to eat some cheerios, drink some sierra mist, and go play in the coolest play therapy room ever! He played really hard and was so happy to be out of the bed! Manly Man brought Jonathan back to the hospital and they had such fun playing together. After about 30 to 45 minutes, we went back down to the room and Jacob wanted to lay on the pull out couch. He was looking a little pale and tired and a little bit later, he threw up again! The doctor was in the room for that one and it bought him another night in the hospital. They hooked him back up to the IV fluids.

(This is in the play room Tuesday morning, right before he got sick again.)

My mom took Jonathan home and I went home for a few hours to spend some time with Jonathan. I could tell that he was being affected by all of this. It was so hard to leave Jacob there, even though Manly Man was with him. It broke my heart! I had fun with Jonathan though….we played a game and watched a little TV and snuggled some. I was so empty and exhausted! Mom and I went back to the hospital with Jonathan and Manly Man brought him home for the night.
The second night in the hospital was a little quieter. The nurse didn’t come in as often, per our request, and she charted his info on the computer outside instead of inside his room where the monitor would glow for what seemed like forever. They stopped his IV fluids at 6am. He ate a little for breakfast and we pushed the fluids. He played, but not as hard, on Wednesday and they discharged us from the hospital about 3pm that afternoon. The boy walked out of the hospital! He didn’t walk at all on Monday, we carried him every where because he was so weak.

(Right after he found out he was going to go home!)

What I learned through all this is...
1. Don’t force them to eat…their appetite will return and they know their bodies better than we do.
2. Do make them drink and monitor their fluids for a few days after the bug; Jacob weighs about 37 pounds and he needs about 45 ounces of fluids a day! Shocking!
3. When your blood sugar drops, it can cause nausea and vomiting…your get caught in a vicious cycle
4. When friends offer to bring something to you, accept it or ask for it…granola and fruit are good options
5. Chap Stick is a must in a hospital…the air is so dry!
6. Slip on shoes like crocs or Birkenstock are great because you can climb in the bed with your child and slip your shoes off very easily and put them back on easily when you need to get up (read: no germies on the bed)
7. Get out of the room and get some sunlight on your face if at all possible…it makes a huge difference!

So, there your have it. If you made it this far, thanks for taking a few minutes. And thank you for your prayers as we went through this.

And as s side note...next February, I have every intention of finding a cave to hibernate in with my family for the whole month! Remember what last February was like?

December, In Pictures

I am feeling totally stressed and totally overwhelmed! I can honestly say I haven't enjoyed this Christmas season at all this year. I have missed Jesus this year. So, I won't post until after Friday. I am taking time for my Savior, and my family. Until then...here are a few pictures from this season so far.

Much love and many blessings!

More Truth

As I got ready to go out to a nice dinner with Manly Man on Monday night, I went through the "I hate all my clothes" song. Are you familiar with that you? I am. All to well. It never ends well. It has even ended in a change of restaurant destinations because all I could fit were a pair of jeans, not very nice ones either.

Well Monday evening went a little differently. As I stood in front of the mirror, I became very frustrated with my turtleneck sweater because it made my big boobs (sorry if any guys are reading this!) look even bigger and it hit at a place in between my hips and waist that wasn't flattering. I started to nit pick at how it looked, how I looked, how I felt. All the while Manly Man had told me at least twice how beautiful and wonderful I looked. I felt a moment of truth flood into my heart. I said aloud, in the mirror, "I am a child of God and that alone is enough. I might have big boobs, but I am still a child of God. I won't nit pick anymore tonight." It felt great. I felt peaceful. And I didn't criticize any more. That night.

As I learn to lean wholly on the Lord I was confronted with hard truth this morning. I wrote that I wanted to be healthy for the Lord. I have written about that a lot on this blog. A lot! The Lord asked me a question this morning. He said, "Do you really want to be healthy for me, or do you just want to look good for the world and for yourself so that you 'feel' better about yourself?" (gulp.) I confessed to Him, that I use health as a disguise. I told Him the truth...that I just wanted to look good, to fit into a certain size, to weigh a certain number. I asked for forgiveness. I also asked Him to help me to be comfortable in my own skin.

The irony of it all...Jacob's verse in Cubbies, at Awana this week:

I am...wonderfully made.

Psalm 139:14

I do love that the Lord has a sense of humor, even though it doesn't always feel so funny!

Humbling

Today is Manly Man's birthday! Happy Day Manly Man!

I arranged for Grandma and Papa to keep the boys last night so Manly Man and I could go on a date! He was so surprised when I asked him to get the stuff out of the back of the van (their pillows and suitcases)! We had a wonderful date...we went to dinner and a movie and then for coffee. It felt really weird not trying to rush home. It felt really weird getting ready for our date and not having children around. It was VERY quiet in our house yesterday afternoon. It was the first time in almost 4 years that we were in our house and the boys were not...almost 4 years! We so needed it!

We have been wanting to see Fireproof since we knew it was coming out, but actually making it to a movie is very hard! We are always interested in movies that have firefighting in it. From Manly Man's perspective, they did a good job, overall. There were a few things we noticed, but all in all, the fire scenes were good. We chuckled at the firehouse humor, and were grateful that the language was MUCH better than it tends to be in a "real" firehouse. Manly Man has to deal with hearing the foul mouths every time he is on duty. It is hard!

We wanted to see the movie for other reasons...it is a Christian done movie, and as a few folks have said, it was well done and not "cheesy." We have also had our fair share of hard things to deal with in our marriage over the last seven years. We learned about the movie when we were going through one of those patches. We have been having honest conversations a lot in the past few months, which have been good, but hard too. Manly Man asked me if I thought that I loved him well. My answer was immediate, "No." I thought that I didn't love him well because I wanted him to meet expectations that weren't fair, especially since he wasn't made to meet them, or even told about them from me! I have been struggling with that the past couple of weeks. While watching Fireproof, I felt the Lord stirring in my heart. I didn't love my husband well because I didn't love the Lord well. It was such a resounding chord in my heart, that I knew it was from the Lord, not the enemy trying to attack me. I cried through most of the movie. I cry thinking about it now. I think that the Lord has been using the past few weeks to soften my heart so that I could actually hear from him! How wonderful that He knew what needed to be done, so that I could be ready to hear the message that I needed. Me loving my husband doesn't come from me...it can only come from an overflow of the love of the Lord. I am humbled now at my need for Him...I always knew that I needed Him, but I thought I could do much of it on my own! It is my prayer that I can lean wholly on the Holy One, instead of just saying that I do.

I am waiting for some answers from the Lord. Perhaps as I do lean wholly, I will start to hear a few more answers!

Are you leaning wholly on the Lord?

On Trying to be Quiet, and Thankful

I'll start with the "thankful" first...just one. My sweet Jakey...every time, and I mean EVERY TIME you give him a kiss, he rubs it in! Seriously! Could he melt my heart anymore than he has? Check him out trying to be all bad!

I have been trying to be still. To be quiet. To be. That is really hard with boys inside the house. And nasty wet weather outside. It seems that I long to "be still and know" in the morning, but it keeps getting upset by the rising children or Manly Man heading out to work. Last Thursday, I actually felt wooed out of bed by a still, sweet, and ever so quiet whisper, to come and sit with Him. It was truly beautiful. To just sit with a cup of coffee and Jesus. I have been trying to stop rattling off my concerns and requests to the Lord, whether they be for others or my family, and trying to listen, to feel. I am not sure what I am hoping for...a stirring in my spirit towards something, an almost audible answer spoken to my heart, a passion to be revealed. I just feel strongly that for me, right now, I need to just sit and listen. For now. Not for later. Now.



I may continue to be quiet in the blog world, as it can be a bit of a distraction at times. Or, I may use this as a tool to work out the stirrings whenever they may come. But for now, I will be quiet.

Blessings to you. And thank you all for your wonderful encouragement in your comments to my previous post! You are awesome!

Where We've Been (ok, where I've been), Part 3

My mom is partly to blame for my absence from the blog world. She bought me this:

I really enjoyed the book. I won't say much about it, except that I REALLY want to re-read it when I can really absorb it. I'll probably have a pen or highlighter, or both, in my hand. I believe that the book is a tool that could change your relationship with the Lord, or bring you into one, if you don't have one already. That good. In my opinion. Anyone else read it? Want to share your thoughts? Email me.

Thursday Thought

At Bible Study this morning, my pastor's wife, who teaches our study, gave us an amazing illustration regarding crucifying the flesh. I had to share...

"If we try to crucify our flesh, by ourselves, we can get one hand nailed up on the cross, but how will we get the other hand nailed up there?"

The point being, WE can't crucify our flesh, only the Holy Spirit can do that!

AMEN!!!

We Will Not Forget

We were all touched by the horrible attack on our country seven years ago this morning. I had just finished teaching my first class and was walking up to the library for my second class. The drama teacher stopped me in the hall and said the trade center had been hit by a plane. I walked up to steps to the library, not really grasping the depth of what had just happened. When I walked in to the library, I understood. I immediately called Manly Man who had just gotten home that morning from the fire station. I told him to turn on the TV and asked him if his father was flying (his dad was a pilot for US Airways at the time and flew to New York some, in those big jumbo jets). He said no and got off the phone. My students and I sat there, glued to the TV. I watched so much of the coverage in the following days. I didn't want to feel numb. I wanted to feel the pain with my country, with it's people. I wanted to remember that day. I do remember. It struck so close to home, with Manly Man being a firefighter, my father-in-law a pilot, and my sister-in-law having flown past the Twin Towers, literally minutes before they were hit.

To those whose lives were forever changed, I have not forgotten. My family has not forgotten. You are in our thoughts and prayers. Your loved one was a hero.

Wordless Wednesday

Please say a prayer for me. I am really having a tough day and just kind of want to walk out of the door for a few hours. But that would require me to leave the children home alone. I am afraid they might burn the house down while I was gone. Questioning our decision to home school today. A few moments of questioning being a mom. Please say a prayer for me.

Grab The Tissues

My mom emailed me this video today. I have seen this team highlighted on the Ironman coverage on TV. I leave you with one question...is there something that, if you child dreamed of being able to do but couldn't, that you wouldn't find a way to make happen?

Thankful Thursday

I am thankful for...

1. Manly Man working so hard for us
2. second chances (and third, and fourth...)
3. the right to home school my children
4. homeopathic allergy relief "medicine"
5. friends who really know me
6. Jacob's laugh that I have to get on tape because it is just way too hysterical!
7. my family's health
8. health and dental insurance for all of our upcoming things that need to be taken care of (next on the list...wisdom teeth out for me...if I can be brave enough)
9. Jonathan randomly hugging me, kissing me and telling me he loves me
10.God not giving up on me, even when I don't believe Him...Lord help my unbelief!

Honesty IS The Best Policy

Whoever came up with that saying was a genius! I remember always being told that by my parents...who doesn't? Telling the truth was always the "right thing" to do, right? Then, somewhere along the line, we decided we didn't always want to hurt the one we were telling the truth to. We started to pad the truth, soften the blow. From there, we spiraled into lying. Some degree of lying, but lying none the less. We didn't always tell the truth. We tried to be self-righteous and say that we didn't want to push someone away,or hurt their feelings or something kind of noble sounding. But the truth was, we were lying. Then it became easy...almost a way of life.
I bet you are wondering if I am a compulsive liar aren't you? I am not really. I do tell lies sometimes. But I am learning. Learning that lying doesn't help. Trying to hide the truth doesn't help. Especially when you are trying to portray yourself as something that you aren't. There has been a lot going on around my house lately. And honesty is reigning, which means that Jesus is reigning. And that my friends, is always an amazing thing! The best thing! It is hard to ask to the hard questions. It is even harder to answer them honestly. In honesty, there is forgiveness. In honesty, there is hope. In honesty, there is healing. In honesty, there are no pedestals or "holier then thou" attitudes. In honesty, there is only love. And love endures! And love is the greatest of things.
I am blown away by the nastiness of my heart sometimes. How I want to hurt Manly Man for something he has said or done. How I choose to be mean to people, family and friends even. How I can be so judgemental about things I know nothing about! How I can decide that "I am not like them."
When I can be hard core honest, it is humbling to watch what the Lord can do. My words, actions or attitudes may seriously hurt someone. But when I choose to be honest about it, and tell them "yep, I sure was trying to hurt you by doing/ saying ___________" and ask for their forgiveness, the honesty touches the other person and brings about a softening of both our hearts, repentance in my heart and forgiveness in their heart. Honesty truly is the best policy. Of course, there must be tact involved. Nobody likes being told they look fat in a pair of jeans. There are appropriate ways to be honest and sometimes it is hard to find that balance.
I challenge you today, to be honest with someone, perhaps yourself, and definitely with the Lord. See what He can do with it. It will blow you away!

Happy 7 Years!

We've come full circle or something like that Manly Man. Seven years today! At 3:30pm to be precise. I can't hardly believe it! We have had our shares of ups and downs, but who hasn't? And I really feel like the completion of 7 is here or something. I feel different this year. Good. Really good actually. Happy. Blessed. Loved. I am so thankful that I am finally starting to settle into the fact that I am loved. Adored actually. I feel that, just so you know...adored. Most of the time. Sometimes I just feel like a worn out wife and mom. But deep down, I know that I am adored. Hey if you didn't adore me, you would have never done this...

That is right ladies. Go ahead and be jealous. But don't hate me too much. My Manly Man sang a song to me at our reception. Not just any song. A song he wrote for me, that I heard for the FIRST time at our reception. And not just any words! Words straight from the cards I mailed him weekly while he was in Rookie School with the fire department (oh yea, I got me a firefighter...manly man that he is!). Yep, he kept them all. They (Fresh Ink, thank you!) always said the right thing.


"Coffee shop, corner booth, lots of time for me and you


Look at me, I'm a wreck, but you stop my bad days in their tracks.


Night and day and night again, I was thinking of you when...into my heart these words of love came in...


So turn the page you'll find my heart, I was hoping you would keep it for a while, keep it for a long long while,


Don't you know oh baby, don't you know that every day your my first smile, your my first smile."


(That is just a sampling.)

I wish I had a way to post him singing it, but I don't at this time...but trust me, it was amazing. He really should have gone out for Nashville Star, that country voice of his just makes me melt! I remember the first time I really heard him sing...I just loved it!

To remind you and to remind myself, here is what I vowed to you that day, seven years ago.

Manly Man, as your wife, I accept the call of God to love you faithfully and unconditionally. For as long as we both shall live, Jesus Christ will always be our Rock and our Fortress. In His strength, I will love Him first and love you second and He will always be the head of our household. I will continually push you toward Christ and encourage you to live for Him always. I will be honest with you and always put first the needs of our family. I will honor you always, trust you always, and support you always. I will be your lover; I will be your best friend; and as long as I live, I will never divorce you. This is my covenant that I make with you.

Today, I affirm that vow to you. I love you very much. I know that I have failed in a lot of way, but I know that Jesus has held us together, and that I will always lean on God's strength to keep my vows.

I love you Manly Man! Happy Anniversary!

(Hey, don't we look like such little babes? What happened?)

PS: Teesa, your dad took all these pics, except the last one!

Fear of...

What are you afraid of? Bees? Snakes? Heights? Confined spaces? Rejection? Disappointment? Failure?

My Manly Man (I just found out he doesn't like "hubby" or "big boy"...sorry babe, I love you!) and I have both been dealing with a sense of failure in the recent past, for a lot of different reasons. I feel like I let him down when the house isn't clean or laundry isn't done, or I don't cook a good enough dinner (or dinner at all for that matter). Now, Manly Man never complains! I am truly blessed with a wonderful husband who doesn't get upset over the aforementioned things. I feel like I let my boys down when I don't play with them. I love my boys and wouldn't trade them for anything (most days...some days I would trade them for an hour of quiet and a skinny iced mocha), but I don't "play" well with them. I just don't love race cars or trains the way they do. Or guns. I feel like I let my friends down for not keeping in better touch. I feel like I let the Lord down for not sitting at His feet more consistently.

I also feel, recently, like I am gun shy to commit to anything. Why you might ask? Because I am afraid that I will fail at it. Am I alone in this? I so desperately want to not ever feel this way again. I don't want to pass this on to my kids. I don't want to be afraid to try. I remember my dad would always tell me "Can't never could."

So, where is all of this coming from? What is the point that I am trying to make? Here goes...

Anyone else familiar with those "last ten pounds?" You know, the ones that won't go away after baby. Maybe they all went away after baby one. Maybe not. Mine did, when I got pregnant with baby two and started back to work. Baby two's last ten, nope. They won't leave.

My story is one that is really hard to explain. Most people don't understand it. Most people just don't get it or just don't believe me. I will simplify it to this...I want to be healthy for the Lord. If those last ten pounds never leave my body, then so be it. I just want to be healthy! My body is the temple of the Holy Spirit and I want to honor God with my body, just as the Bible exhorts me to. I want to have a healthy relationship with food. It isn't healthy now. (I won't go into detail here.) I want to "eat to live." I don't. I think this is hard for a majority of women...to be happy with themselves. I think a lot of stay at home moms have "issues" with food. I didn't have any problems until I became a stay at home mom and did ALL the shopping and had "tons" of time on my hands.

When Manly Man and I got married, I gained the "marriage weight," kind of like the Freshman Fifteen! Remember that? I lost it through Weight Watchers. It is a wonderful program, because it allows you to eat whatever you want, in moderation. That is the problem...they stress the healthy part, but you don't have to do it to get the weight gone...just lower your calories (watching your points). Because I truly long to be healthy, I have had a hard time going back to the program. I find myself just eating junk, and then falling off the "wagon", and not wanting to get back on. "Nothing tastes as good as thin feels"? Have you not ever eaten!

I am scared to to accountable for the needed weight loss. I am scared to fess up to what I eat. I am scared to be honest for people. I am afraid they won't like me or will will not want to be my friend. It is that failure thing.

So, I am venturing out, because I don't know what else to do. I am asking you who read this blog to please leave a comment if you have any encouragement or want to offer some sort of advice, without being critical. I want to do it the "right" way. The healthy way.